Trauma Responses: A Deeper Look at Freeze and Fawn

When we think of trauma responses, most people are familiar with the “fight or flight” response. These are the survival mechanisms our nervous systems activate when we perceive a threat. However, there are two lesser-known (and often misunderstood) responses that are just as important: freeze and fawn. These reactions can profoundly influence how we relate to ourselves and others, especially after chronic or developmental trauma. Let’s take a deeper look at what freeze and fawn responses are, why they develop, and how we can begin to heal from them.

What Is the Freeze Response?

The freeze response is the body’s way of shutting down in the face of overwhelming danger. When neither fighting nor fleeing seems possible or safe, the nervous system can default to a kind of paralysis to avoid detection or further harm. This reaction is rooted in evolutionary biology. Many animals freeze when threatened as a last-ditch effort to protect themselves and survive. In humans, the freeze response can look like:

• Dissociation

• Feeling disconnected from your body

• Emotional flatness

• Difficulty making decisions or taking action

• Feeling “stuck” in life or relationships

• A tendency to shut down in stressful situations

Why Freezing Happens

The freeze state is the nervous system’s attempt to protect us from harm. When the body perceives that escape or resistance is impossible, it might conserve energy and avoid additional pain by going still. Often, people who experienced trauma that felt inescapable, such as childhood neglect, abuse, or witnessing violence, develop this pattern. However, what once kept us safe can become maladaptive if it persists long after the threat has passed.

What Is the Fawn Response?

The fawn response is characterized by people-pleasing, appeasement, and a focus on taking care of others at the expense of oneself. It typically emerges in environments where conflict is dangerous, and safety is best found through compliance. Signs of the fawn response include:

• Difficulty saying “no” or setting boundaries

• Chronic people-pleasing and approval-seeking

• Merging your identity with others to avoid rejection

• Putting others’ needs ahead of your own to stay safe

• Feeling guilt or anxiety when prioritizing yourself

Why Fawning Happens

Fawning is a strategy born from fear. If fighting back or fleeing results in punishment (or isn’t possible at all), then pleasing the perceived threat may have been the only way to stay safe. Over time, this coping mechanism can become a person’s default behavior in many of their relationships. They may fall into toxic relationship dynamics and lose their own identity along the way.

Healing from Trauma Responses

Understanding when you’re engaging in freeze and fawn responses allows you to shift from shame to self-compassion. These patterns aren’t signs of weakness; they’re simply adaptations in response to threats. However, if they continue to shape your life unconsciously, they can lead to burnout, disconnection, and resentment. If you recognize freeze or fawn tendencies in yourself, here are a few starting points:

• Practice self-awareness. Begin noticing your internal state in moments of stress. Do you shut down? Do you rush to soothe others even when it costs you?

• Start small with boundaries. Practice saying no in low-stakes situations, and notice how your body responds.

• Rediscover your identity. Your trauma responses may have you losing touch with your own preferences. Start exploring questions like: What do I want? What brings me joy? What would I choose if I weren’t afraid of disappointing others?

• Practice daily check-ins. Ask yourself a few times a day: What am I feeling? What do I need right now? This reinforces the habit of tuning in before tuning out or appeasing others.

Getting Professional Help

It’s not easy to heal from trauma on your own, and you don’t have to do it alone. Contact us today to talk about trauma therapies like eye-movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR) and whether they’re right for you. With help, you can reconnect with yourself.

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