For many years, much of the LGBTQIA+ population had to keep their sexual orientation or gender identity a secret. Thus, it was impossible to calculate their numbers. Things have improved in many ways, and this reality allows for keeping official statistics. For example, nearly three million LGBTQIA+ people in the U.S. are now over 50. Almost one-third of them are 65 and older.
This begs a question that was rarely asked in the past. What specific challenges does the LGBTQIA+ population face as they age? Of course, they might deal with many of the same issues anyone over 50 would. However, there are some unique concerns about this growing demographic.
There Have Been Changes, But…
Pondering the questions posed in this post was different when more LGBTQIA+ people faced more legal obstacles and, of course, discrimination. Generally speaking (because there’s more work to be done), today’s aging population has greater access to healthcare and other options. Some have more familial and societal support and thus do not face as much social isolation as their predecessors. LGBTQ+ therapy can help address the unique challenges they face as they grow older.
Even so, today’s older LGBTQIA+ people have been found to report:
Higher rates of loneliness
Less relationship satisfaction
Ongoing stigma
More depression, anxiety, and emotional distress
A greater risk of self-harm or suicide
All of this adds up to some very distinct and daunting challenges.
Some of the Unique Challenges with Aging for the LGBTQIA+ Population
Discrimination
This remains the biggest obstacle. Discrimination, in different ways, can block access to crucial resources like housing, healthcare, legal services, retirement support, and more.
Health
For all the reasons we’ve discussed here so far, LGBTQIA+ older adults tend to delay seeking help more than other people. Their fear of discrimination and stigma has resulted in higher rates of issues like cardiovascular disease, depression, disability, and more.
Finance-Related
LGBTQIA+ adults often experience negative employment disparities that decrease their earnings and their ability to save. Also, they are frequently less likely to have children and grandchildren who can help out with elder care — thus driving up care costs.
How Does One Define Successful Aging for LGBTQIA+ People?
LGBTQIA+ people do not make up a monolithic group that all face the same exact issues. They are diverse, and their situations are distinct. With that in mind, there is no single definition of “successful aging” for them or for any group. To keep things simple and applicable, we might say that when people in this age group feel financially, socially, and physically secure, they are successfully aging.
For older LGBTQIA+ people, this definition would also include a sense of belonging. As they age, they can feel safe that they are accepted and validated — and possess the grace and resilience they need when facing bigotry or bias. Like all groups of aging humans, they deserve freedom from the repressive scourge of ageism, too.
LGBTQIA+ people want marginalization to be replaced by acceptance. After a lifetime of overt and covert risks and threats, they simply want to thrive in their older years. But how does one begin to make this happen?
Connecting With a Therapist Friendly to LGBTQIA+ Needs
In many ways, older LGBTQIA+ people are blazing yet another new path. It may not feel fair to have this responsibility added to your existing burdens, but there are self-loving steps you can take. Perhaps the biggest is to get the professional support you deserve. Meeting with a therapist who gets it is a powerfully soothing way to trust that you can move forward confidently into your senior years. If you or someone you know fits into the demographic discussed herein, I invite you to reach out to start a conversation.
About the Author
Deborah Duley, LCSW-C is a licensed clinical social worker and founder of the Leonardtown, MD-based mental health practice, Empowered Connections, LLC. She works closely with children, teens, and women, including members of the LGBTQ+ community on a wide range of presenting concerns using therapeutic modalities such as brainspotting and EMDR. She offers sessions online and in person in both English and Spanish.
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